yumemigaoka | November catch-all ♫

[....this answer is also a little concerning? And a little disheartening? But. Hmm. Lisa smiles, but there's a tinge of worry in it.]

You're right, I am there a lot of the time, and I make a point to be. But even then... it's not just out of duty, you know? I care a lot about just about everyone that I know around here. So I'd be there, but I'd be there for you. And I'd probably be pretty loud and forward about it. I care about you, and I don't want to see you get hurt. Or worse. I don't think I'm the only person, either.

[A little bit of a wry grin tugs at her lips.]

Sorry, I was teasing you a little earlier. No, you're at no risk from me. I'm not that mean, and I hope you don't ever think I would be that mean.

At this rate I should manage self-control within... oh, the next decade? [Lisa shrugs, still grinning.] I kid, I kid. I'll be okay. As okay as I ever get, anyway.

[She peers into her tote bag briefly, making sure her phone didn't end up in a carton of eggs or something. Which reminds her-]

On that note, I should probably get to baking soon, or I really will be stressing. I promised a certain person a birthday present - well, aside from just now - and I'm running out of time to make it.

You still might beat me to really succeeding at it.

[ But she's not as old as she acts like she is. ]

Mm. I won't hold you up from that any longer, then.

I don't.. think you're mean.

[ The girl is saying it very slowly. Almost like she has to think about the words as she's saying them - or maybe like she's thinking about something else, even though she's saying something that's pretty natural to herself.

Of course Lisa isn't mean. She's kind of scary in how strong she is in Illya's eyes, despite what Lisa confided about in her before, but she's not mean. She wouldn't be.

It's something else that Illya is thinking about. ]

I don't.. [ Her voice trails off.

She frowns. Not an angry frown, but a confused one. ]

I'm not sure I understand everything else you're saying though. [ Like there's something about it that is that strange to Illya. ]

[He's looking out for her, right? She can feel that, and she's happy to have it.]

Okay. I mean, you're probably right, but. I'm... gonna work harder to let things go. Isn't sweating things out kind of my signature at this point? [Lisa that's not a positive point-] I'm no brain either, anyway. Maybe I'll try it your way and just go with the flow a little more.

[Whether or not she's to be believed... eh. She has that tendency to downplay her own issues.]

Unlike a certain someone, I don't exactly cover the whole city every day. But I'll come by.

Sometimes I wonder if there's some cosmic application process to become a Dreamer. I know we have an idea what gives people their Sandglasses, but we sure don't see well-adjusted Dreamers very often.

[She says this with a soft smile; while it's clear her own circumstances are still on her mind, she's feeling comfortable enough to joke about it, so. She'll be fine.]

No sugar cookies for you this year, message received. Well, I did want a new challenge...

[Not that Lisa's likely to turn Junna down for much of anything at this point, but... she's content. Or, well. Not content. She'd happily keep going if she thought she could get away with it. But as Junna pulls back enough to take stock and let herself come down the from the high - Lisa needs it too, if she's being totally honest - she's not going to push. That hand on her cheek helps, too; she cants her head into it. It's still taking her a second to boot back up, at any rate.]

Me neither. You surprised me, but... I'm starting to like surprises again.

[.......there's also a certain thrill that she just had her first kiss with her girlfriend in her parents' kitchen with. No real guarantee they won't walk in at any given moment. She's pretty sure they're not coming home soon, but... having to answer that question right now would break her, and her face flushes beet red at the idea, her smile turning a little daring all the same.]

...some surprises. I might need to push moving out further up on the timetable.

[The dazed feeling isn't leaving, and Junna doesn't mind that at all. She runs her thumb across Lisa's cheek, still with a smile on her face. She looks around -- becoming aware they are in the kitchen, and she's not sure how alone they are in the grand sense of things. Then, her eyes are back on Lisa.

She catches her meaning.]

...I think I could help with research for that. For... more surprises. [She laughs a little -- then she inches closer to Lisa, looking at her with a thoughtful expression. Maybe they should slow things down, not risk getting in trouble, and talk a bit more.

Or, instead, she could say:] ...I am told that practice makes perfect. [And now she's getting redder in the face. But really, she doesn't want to think about her problems, and this is more than a distraction.]

[...the fear is strong but the resolve is crumbling under Junna's continued affection. Damn, but this girl knows how to rile her up... Her eyes shimmer as she tries to keep what composure she has left.]

I'll be counting on you, then... later. Right now, someone very important to me needs me for a little longer. [Lisa winks at her; she'd try to boop her nose but she has a very strong suspicion she'd miss. Probably on purpose.] The rest will wait.

[And she leans back in to kiss Junna again, reaching up to wrap her arms around the taller girl's neck. It's missing the immediacy and the tension of the first time, but that's okay. The intention, this time, is maybe even more important. For all her worries and her fears, this is important enough for Lisa to set it aside and just go for it. It took Junna going first, but she's happy to keep going.]

I can't believe I'm saying this, but work can wait. [The wink gets a laugh out of Junna. She leans in closer because her idea was read loud and clear. And besides. She does need Lisa right now. Hearing it just makes it more true.

Her arms wrap around Lisa's waist in turn. She kisses her back, and it's not with same nervousness and doubts as before, and that's fine with her. They earned this.]

Hah! The first part is always to recognize that there's a problem! Or so I've heard. But even if you can't stop worrying, you just need to figure out how to unwind yourself afterwards. [wink] This isn't a multiple choice quiz so there's no harm in trying out different things.

[he's here to hold people accountable! ... Probably]

Hehe~ [there's a toothy grin at that. Guilty as charged, it seems] Gotta keep people on their toes somehow~

But even I find time to unwind. It just so happens that running around is my version of relaxing.

[Lisa's comment, amazingly, makes him grin as he leans back slightly.]

We don't see well-adjusted Dreamers often because being a Dreamer messes you up bad. Think about it. You've been handed a weird sort of power no one is really equipped to just work with the moment you get it, barring myself of course. You go off into strange worlds and get into frequent battles, You get made a lot of by the public, the DU, the government, everything. None of that stuff's really healthy, you know! It's a hell of a lot to dump on a teenager on top of everything else you've got to struggle with at that age.

[Lisa blinks. After the earlier exclamation, she'd thought that would be the harder part, and there'd be a strange manzai routine where Lisa insists she's not going to bring harm to a young girl, even for comedic value when it wouldn't do any damage. No, this part is the more concerning one. She forces herself to relax and slow down a bit, even though something about this is setting off alarm bells in her head.]

I take Dreaming kinda seriously. You know that, I've harped on it before, I've had some nervous breakdowns over it, I see a therapist about it, it's how it goes. [She waves a hand in the air dismissively (negligently), as if that's not a strange statement, said with all the gravity of a grocery list.] So you're right, the next time a Disturbance comes up, I'm going to be there. And you're also right that I'd rescue anyone that needed it. But...

[How to put this in a way that won't make her own walls slam up behind her, but also won't be disrespecting Illya...?]

You're a little bit higher priority than that for me, Illya-chan. I want you to be safe. I want you to have a better school life than I did. And I want you to find the people and the things that make you happy. So if you do end up stuck in a Disturbance? Forget exams. Forget family. Forget dates. None of those things are as important to me as you, and I am coming in there if it's the last thing I do, screaming my head off to bring in everyone that'll listen to me. And either I'm dragging you out myself, or I'm beating up whatever put you in there in the first place while someone else does it. That's a promise.

[Her tone's been building into something thick and full of emotion as she goes; she still worries that really will happen. If not to Illya, to someone else she's close to. So she chokes up for a moment, swallowing to clear her throat. Even when she has, though, she doesn't continue; her thoughts are too jumbled after working herself up. She'll be okay in a minute, sorry, Illya.]

Then I guess I'll just have to keep trying things and see what works. I let myself get too caught up in things that are supposed to be relaxing... well, I'll manage. [She shakes her head, before giving him a wry smile.] In an emergency, I know one person who'll be able to help. I just need to not burden her too much.

[Lisa lets out a breath, letting herself fall bonelessly back against the bench.]

Speaking of destressing, though, I think I needed someone to vent to for a bit. I'm sorry you had to be the one to deal with it, but I'm definitely not sorry I did it. I... do feel a little better.

[That gives Lisa pause, and she sinks back into her train seat as she thinks. It's... vexing.]

And when I did get that weird power, even all that was still better than the situation I was in when I got it, so I didn't mind diving headfirst into that lifestyle because it hurt less... and even now, the way it's changed my life, I'd still rather have this. [For a second, she looks helpless, as she looks at her hands in her lap. Then she shakes her head, glancing back to Zeke.] Damned if you do, damned if you don't, huh? And then you've got the crazies like me that want to keep doing it. [There's something about the grin that comes to her face... it's self-deprecating, sure, but she knows she's going the right way at the end of the day. Pain now with the promise of a better tomorrow.] I'm sure we frustrate you to no end when we aren't taking this seriously.

Why are you apologizing? We're friends, right? And hey, I'm the one who asked for the tea. So really, if there's anyone here who we're going to blame...

[he takes a dramatic sip of what remains of his soda to emphasize]

Sometimes, it's easier to carry things around when you have someone to share it with. [and sometimes, you're a free spirit like Nikki, who doesn't seem to have anything weighing his heart down] But don't forget; it's okay to ask for help too.

Mom's used to me coming back at weird times so we can stay out here as long as you want... Or at least before the last train leaves for the night.

More when you don't take yourselves seriously -- as in your own needs and feelings and all that stuff. But you don't get taught better to start with, like you should. And that's why I'm pushing paper nine to five.

[Someday, he'll get those mandatory counseling and Dreamer skills courses to be law. SOMEday.]

[Lisa laughs; it's not as broken a sound as some of the ones she was making earlier this evening, so that's probably a good sign.]

It's habit, I think. I'm not really... used to leaning on people, and so when I need help, I tend to see it as a failure on my part. But I'm learning. I'll get there. I just really need to not... let it get this bad, I guess.

[As he offers for her to stay longer, she looks at the drink in her hand, then at the last dregs of natural light fading from the sky, before turning back to him with a sad smile.]

No, I better get home. I don't really want to go, but I need to. I've got homework I should take a look at, if nothing else. But... thanks, Nikki. I appreciate you- no. [Marshalling her emotions, the look on her face turns into something warmer, more true.] I'm really glad you stopped to ask after me.

I'll let you in on a little secret...

[Nikki leans in, raising his (mostly empty) can of soda up to act as a wall for... Secrecy? Not that it helps any when he's talking to her in the loudest possible stage whisper]

Knowing when to ask for help is the hardest part.

[he gives her a cheerful smile]

Hey, no problem. [comes the easy going Engrish] What can I say? You looked like you need a hand and I'm always happy to lend an ear. [a small salute]

Let me know what you're good to go. I'll walk you back to the station.

[Yeah, Zeke, right when Ai becomes mayor of Yumemigaoka and just writes Dreamer reforms into provincial law herself.]

And even if you teach us to be better, that doesn't mean we'll listen. A lot of us are teenagers, you know. [Lisa flashes him a wry smile.] We're going to be rebellious just because you said so. I think you're right to want that, but... [Some of the cheer bleeds off.] Some of us just won't learn until we mess around and find out. I sure didn't, even with everyone helping me. That's also part of being a teenager.

Oh, I absolutely know that. I always have. Just... pride, I guess. Whatever of that I have left. [There's no discomfort in her tone at that. Just... acceptance.] I think... needing to be better for someone else helps.

[She finishes her au lait, twisting the top back on, and lightly tosses the bottle at the trash can next to the bench... which bounces off the rim twice and falls to the ground. Lisa watches with a snort, standing up to grab it and toss it in, not sitting back down after. She stretches with a soft groan, glancing at Nikki with a smile, if one a little less playful.]

My problems won't get any better by running away from them... [A pause.] Well. This specific problem won't get better unless I actively do something about it. That something... might look like running away, but it's gotta be something more than that.

[Nikki shrugs one shoulder and downs the rest of his soda]

The important part is that it works for you.

[there's a momentary pause before he's hopping back a couple of steps. Then he's tossing his empty soda can like a basketball into the trash. It's unnecessarily showy, more so when the can lands in the trash bin with a hollow clatter. Nothing but net.

He lets his arms swing as he drops them from their previous position, easygoing smile on his face]

Whether it's running away from something or running straight towards it! If it gets you where you need to go, then that's what you need to do.

C'mon! [he motions for her to follow him] Let's get going before it gets too dark.

[ Oh no, Lisa.

Illya feels incredibly bad for the other girl when she watches her get emotional - and really, considering Lisa did mention seeing a therapist and all, maybe it makes Lisa's reaction here immediately make sense - but maybe it also helps a little. Illya wouldn't know how to properly process those words by themselves, but right now there's something else to focus on, making it a little easier in this moment.

She takes a quick step forward to be closer to Lisa, reaching out to grab one of the other girl's hands, giving it a slight squeeze. ]

Don't cry.. [ She pleads, softly. ] I don't want you to have to cry over this.

[...it's hard, sorting yourself out after you've pushed your emotions a little too far for a second. Lisa slowly regains herself after a moment, helped along by the hand holding hers. She smiles down at Illya, able to handle that much, before she takes a deep breath, eyes still a little watery. The quaver in her voice is there if you're listening for it, but she's got just enough vocal training to mask it otherwise.]

Sometimes crying is all I know how to do, you know? Because either I cry or I scream. And- [sniffle-] I'd rather cry for other people than for myself anyway. I've cried enough for myself.

[She pauses, and reaches into a side pocket of her tote for a tissue with her free hand with a very clearly practiced motion. She dabs at her eyes briefly before trying to clear her nose.]

But... thanks. I didn't mean to make you worry over me. I'll apologize for that. Not for the rest of it, though.

[Ai wouldn't do that. She's just as bad as everyone else, if not worse.]

Sure, sure. You're going to make mistakes. That's just life. Best I can hope for is that you make all new mistakes instead of ones I'm trying to help you avoid, yeah?

[But then he smirks.] Meanwhile you'll just have to put up with me ignoring the actually quite small age gap and treating you guys like kids. Or maybe kid sisters. Whatever the case, I'm gonna keep looking out for you all, whether you're glad or it drives you crazy. In the perfect world it does both!

November catch-all ♫

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