Thanks. I'll wanna do this again. More than once, too. [She's thought about whether they could afford a pool table in their apartment. If they could fit one. It's an idle thought, for after they get a place. Junna can't get too far ahead of herself yet, after all. Besides... there's something heavier to think about.
The Disturbance is, ultimately, her. As Lisa says: it's undiluted, it's Junna without hope and happiness, it's all of her fears and worries magnified. It's a sobering thought, but Junna nods her head. A similar thought goes through her mind: this isn't something they can talk about once. It'll take a lot of time to work through, both with the help of therapists and a lot more talks to come. And more than that; they need to be a reason for each other to keep working. A reason to be happy.
She does spot the way Lisa looks upset. She doesn't know why -- but she has a few good guesses. She walks over, and takes her hand.] I... I think I understand. It's somewhere in the middle. I'm... [She smiles, a little.] It might hurt and help at the same time. I want the closure, too, though. And I want to hear what happened, and... I don't want to say I'm ready for it in the sense that I'm completely prepared. But--
[She squeezes Lisa's hand.] I'm ready because I want to know. And it... it does help to hear it, instead of imagine it, make it worse in my head, and then react to that instead. And I--I mean... [Her expression turns more fragile, for a second, and she looks at Lisa.] ...My imagination can say a lot of terrible things that aren't true, Lisa. It's helping. I promise.
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The Disturbance is, ultimately, her. As Lisa says: it's undiluted, it's Junna without hope and happiness, it's all of her fears and worries magnified. It's a sobering thought, but Junna nods her head. A similar thought goes through her mind: this isn't something they can talk about once. It'll take a lot of time to work through, both with the help of therapists and a lot more talks to come. And more than that; they need to be a reason for each other to keep working. A reason to be happy.
She does spot the way Lisa looks upset. She doesn't know why -- but she has a few good guesses. She walks over, and takes her hand.] I... I think I understand. It's somewhere in the middle. I'm... [She smiles, a little.] It might hurt and help at the same time. I want the closure, too, though. And I want to hear what happened, and... I don't want to say I'm ready for it in the sense that I'm completely prepared. But--
[She squeezes Lisa's hand.] I'm ready because I want to know. And it... it does help to hear it, instead of imagine it, make it worse in my head, and then react to that instead. And I--I mean... [Her expression turns more fragile, for a second, and she looks at Lisa.] ...My imagination can say a lot of terrible things that aren't true, Lisa. It's helping. I promise.