Hanako ❁ ƎN∀W∀ Iפ∩⅄ (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
hanamane) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
yumemigaoka2023-06-05 10:14 pm
hanamane) wrote in yumemigaoka2023-06-05 10:14 pm
Entry tags:
OPEN ✿ June Catch-All
⭐ Who: Amane and YOU
⭐ When: Throughout June
⭐ Where: Moon Bunny Market (namely @ Camellia), Riverwalk Theater, Dream Sphere (Slumbering City and N E W L O C A T I O N)
⭐ What: PLANT GAYS, Kaiju movies, Hanako being sulky about missing Dreamer-versary things and a Completely Normal Dreamer bonding trip gone horribly, terribly wrong
⭐ Warnings: Possible mentions of chronic illness in meta text, spiders, Dream Sphere death by miasma poisoning; will update with top-levels and further warnings if need be!
⭐ When: Throughout June
⭐ Where: Moon Bunny Market (namely @ Camellia), Riverwalk Theater, Dream Sphere (Slumbering City and N E W L O C A T I O N)
⭐ What: PLANT GAYS, Kaiju movies, Hanako being sulky about missing Dreamer-versary things and a Completely Normal Dreamer bonding trip gone horribly, terribly wrong
⭐ Warnings: Possible mentions of chronic illness in meta text, spiders, Dream Sphere death by miasma poisoning; will update with top-levels and further warnings if need be!
PLANT GAYS (June 9-11)
Amane, on his end, is keeping an eye on the outdoor table, clad in a surgical mask and looking every bit the brooding teenager as he slumps in his chair. He doesn't seem to be making much of an effort to draw people in, but for the ones who do, to investigate the pots or peek over at the workshop, he tries to give them his attention-- until another nasty coughing fit takes over, leaving him a little short of breath. Welp. We know what the mask is for now, at least.]
S... Sorry, did you-- were you looking for something, or...?
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[Diplomatically, Zeke ignores that terrible coughing fit as he leans on the table to look at the wares.]
Never certain just what to get to show support around this time. Any recommendations?
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U-Um... [He makes an attempt to clear his throat, to ease his nerves a little] I've heard there's a flag for Allies, but I'm... not really sure we have anything with that on it right now, so maybe... just a regular rainbow pot? Or keychain, we got a lot of those, too.
[Finley for sure knew more about LGBT culture than Amane did, but he was already busy enough working on painting the pots that he didn't really want to bug him about it right now. But hopefully it was a close enough answer?]
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A keychain! That'll work great. I can hang it off my lanyard while I'm in the office.
[A lanyard would be better! But who's going to be picky about what's being offered? ]
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Ah... we do have bracelets and pins, too, if you think that'll work better with your lanyard. Or stickers, but that might block your ID or something, so that's up to you.
[Amane might be under the weather at the moment (physically and emotionally), but he still knew how to push product when it counted!!!]
I guess it depends on the kind of office you work in, though? [AS IF HE DIDN'T ALREADY KNOW]
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[Is it really pushing product if your customer is charging forward on their own accord?]
Hmm, sticker though. There's got to be someplace for that...
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Maybe... on a work folder or clipboard or something...? That's if they let you put stuff on their property, anyway.
Sounds like a nice gig, though. Where do you work?
[AS IF HE DIDN'T ALREADY KNOW]
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[He says this with such pride, too. Some people view the Bureau as unnecessary government interference, and some as a clumsy means of control, but Zeke's absolutely committed to the true shining principle underlying all those promises.]
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Oh. That sounds like... [Pretend you know what he's talking about, Amane!!] a lot.
[NAILED IT.
It's then that another coughing fit decides to take hold, and he turns his head away as he lets it ride out. Sure, he had the mask on, but it still felt like the proper thing to do.]
U-Um, so-- that's pretty neat you work with Dreamers, though. I've never really met any myself [LIAR], but I'm sure the workplace never gets boring when they're involved.
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Clearly, you've never done bureaucracy. Although a lot of my job is delegating that to other people so I don't have to deal with it. Dreamers are a mess and a half sometimes, so we need results more than we need checklists and procurement contracts!
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[That probably should answer that when it came to his bureaucracy experience!! Though given his limited knowledge on the subject, maybe that was a silly question to pose. But still...]
Is there really that much legal stuff involved with being a Dreamer, though? I thought they just... go in and fight monsters and the Union just keeps them organized.
[Clearly someone hadn't throughly read their paperwork when they registered at the DU!!]
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[Zeke shakes his head. If it weren't for Dreaming he'd go insane from the sheer banality of it all. The hours he spends asleep make up for the hours he's waking.]
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Ah... I see.
[He does not see. Not at ALL.]
... y'know, I think I'm just going to give you the sticker and pin for free. It sounds like you have a lot on your hands already, so...
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Amane-kun! [ An admonishing what do you think you're up to young man sort of voice. ] You should be in bed with a cough like that!
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Her admonishment leaves him flushed and somehow even more sulky, and he pointedly avoids her gaze as he readjusts his mask a little.]
I-I'm fine. [And, if on some ironic cue, another coughing fit takes hold, though it's thankfully less intense than the last one-- not that it helps his defense any.] I don't... I don't have a fever or anything, and it's not like I'm doing much here, anyway.
[Which is probably more reason for him to go back to his room, honestly, but he'd spent enough time there since the incident that he just needed a change of scenery to try to get his mind off of things. (Not that it was really working at this point, unfortunately]
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[ honestly it's a good job he pre-empted her about having no fever because going by the urgent way she whips off her shades to get a better look at him, she's not that far from scruffing him like a cat to take his temperature and make sure. ]
It's not really cold season, is it? And you've never had allergies like this...
[ Jiiiiiiiiiiiiii. She's staring at him hard enough to burn a hole through his mask. ]
So what's wrong?
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I said, it's nothing. It's just--
[... but he can't. Ai was the only person he could talk to in the Waking World right now who probably would fully understand the situation he was in. Sure, he gave the Cliff Notes explanation to his parents, to his brother, to assure them he wasn't coming down with something again, but... they weren't Dreamers. They didn't know the weight and the pains that came along with it.]
... it's just a Dreamer thing. That's all.
[His voice is barely a mumble, both from the reluctance of admitting that much, and also out of fear someone might eavesdrop. The area was fairly empty, so it wasn't all that likely, but it never hurt to be cautious regardless.]
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. . . I see.
[ There's a pause, where it's not clear whether or not she's going to push on that or leave him be. But then she glances up and down the market just to make sure there's nobody else around and... promptly scoots her way around the table so she can stoop down next to him. It's fine, she has honorary aunt privileges. ]
You were ejected. [ Her voice is at once softer and yet a little firmer, too – right now, she's switched tracks to senpai Ai. ] It must've been bad if you're still feeling the effects.
[ Not quite a question – but an offer for him to fill in the details, if he wants. ]
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... yeah.
[It wasn't as if it was the first time he had been ejected, though-- the infamous incident with Cinnabar accidentally covering him with liquid mercury had hardly been a pleasant experience, and it had left Amane with an annoying rash and little appetite for nearly week after it happened. But that was different story; it hadn't been his fault that it happened (well, mostly-- he could have tried to give a bigger berth to someone wielding toxic metal, but that was besides the point!!), so it was easier to chalk it up to the situation and his inexperience and move past it. But this time... it was different. He was supposed to be the responsible one, the one showing someone else the ropes, and what did he do? He got them hurt, along with the person who (rightfully) tagged along because they were concerned about him screwing something up.
Amane burrows his head further into his arms, his voice muffled as he continues on.]
It was my first outing as a Mentor, too.
[It's easy to hear the hurt, bitter edge to his words there, despite the muted noise, filled with both the frustration and the disappointment he didn't want to state aloud. He wouldn't have been the first Mentor it had happened to, and definitely not the last, but... he was still a thirteen year old boy, one who just so happened to get a rude wake-up call from all of his misguided confidence of youth.]
.. it sucks.
[Well, he'll allow himself that, at least-- there's no denying that the situation is anything but crappy.]
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What's that old saying? Failure is the best teacher? She's not sure if she believes it, but... ]
Mm. It sure does. And I bet you've been beating yourself up this whole time, thinking you really messed up, huh?
[ She doesn't even need an answer to that. She can see it all over his face and...
Well. She'd be doing the same thing. ]
I hate to say it, but... messing up a little bit is an important part of learning. Not just for you, but for your trainees, too. I know it wasn't fun but the thing about dreaming like we do is that it's not always fun – but when it's so bright and exciting over there, it's easy to forget.
[ She lifts her hand and applies the patented Hoshino Ai Headpat. ]
But you did your best. Right?
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Regardless of the reason, he was going to keep his head buried in his arms still, the only tells of his tears being the slight sniffle behind his mask and the dampness on his shirtsleeves. It was silly to feel self-conscious about crying in front of Ai-- after all, how many times had she seen him wailing as a child when Tsukasa had broken one of his toys, or when he wasn't feeling well?-- but he was getting to that age where being vulnerable was a less than ideal thing, something he didn't even want to show around his own parents. He had thought he was getting stronger, more sure of himself, both here and in the Dream Sphere... but all it took was one bad misstep to shatter that veil of invincibility.
His voice is thick with emotion when he tries to answer her question, and he attempts to swallow it down, even it out so she doesn't have more to worry over. Because... he wanted to believe he did his best. He wanted to so badly. But--]
I--I thought I did. But-- I could have done more. I could have protected them better, but instead...
[Instead, Cinnabar got ambushed and Mantle succumbed to the poison in the air-- kinder fates than what Amane himself wound up enduring (spiders no doubt were going to leave him jumpy for a while), but perhaps preventable if he had been paying better attention. Maybe he should have taken pride in the fact he was the last to fall, but all he could feel was the resounding guilt of not being able to save them sooner.]
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[ Despite everything, there's a warm swell of pride that comes with his words. Amane isn't just frustrated because he failed himself – he's upset because he felt like he couldn't protect the people who were relying on him. That means his heart's in the right place... and really, as a mentor, that's about the only thing she could ask for. ]
But that just means that when you do go back, you'll be a little smarter and a little quicker to fix things. The only way to know how to avoid making mistakes is... well, you've just gotta make a few. It never gets any more fun, but the more it happens and the more you learn, the easier it'll get.
[ The hand that had been laying on his head moves around to his shoulders as she gives him a gentle, one-armed hug. ]
I'm always going to be proud of how hard you work no matter how many mistakes you make, you know? That's what learning is.
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So he sits there, quietly, absorbing Ai's words like a sponge, not daring to speak lest his voice betrays his emotions again. Everything she says, logically, makes sense-- it's trial and error, after all, and astronomy itself was built off of people continually building and improving upon mistakes. But, emotionally... will he have to deal with this sort of guilt and heartbreak every time he screws up in the Dream Sphere now? If he had a weaker resolve, this would be the time to question whether he was cut out for this life-- but for as much as this hurt, Amane knew he could never give it up. Not over this.
It's that last line that hits him the hardest, however, wrenching a tiny, choked back sob from the back of his throat. He feels that arm of hers draw him in for a hug, and, after a moment's hesitation, he lifts up his head and carefully rests it upon her shoulder. There's a half-hearted attempt to scrub off any tears still threatening to escape with the heel of his hands, pushing his mask askew in the process, though there's no hiding the red-rimmed, puffy eyes that peek out from underneath his choppy dark bangs. Maybe he was still just a kid after all, one who needed a hug and a reassuring word from someone who truly understood after a particularly hard day.]
... guess I really am coming back to you for help this soon, aren't I? Thought it'd be another few months, at least.
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[ She gives his hair a gentle, playful ruffle. ]
Just take it slow and get better and then when you're feeling up to it again, we'll go out and find someplace cool to explore over there. And we'll beat up a couple Torments as your revenge match.
[ She gives him a grin, trying to encourage a smile onto his face. ]
You think you're up for that?
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There's a cold, uneasy feeling prickling in his chest at Ai's offer, however, just for a moment, and the very presence of it gives him pause. An opportunity to go exploring with her would normally leave him excited-- ecstatic, even-- but instead, that eagerness is tempered by something a bit more apprehensive. Ai has been doing this Dreamer thing since well before he was born, so it goes without saying she knew how to handle herself much better than he did. But... what if something unexpected wound up happening on this Excursion together? What if they ran into a Torment or Nightmare they couldn't escape, and he wasn't able to watch her back? He never really worried about stuff like this before, having had enough confidence in Ai's skills and his own, but-- the very idea of possibly seeing her get seriously hurt or even ejected from the Dream Sphere left him feeling unsettled. Of all the people Amane wanted to keep safe as a Dreamer, Ai was at the top of the list.
... Of course, no doubt she probably had gotten into scrapes and mishaps WAY worse than this during her time as Ai-Doll, so perhaps stressing over this was a moot point. Still, that sliver of doubt had wormed it's way in there, and he's afraid of even bringing it up lest the powers that be somehow turn his worries into a possibility. So instead, he offers her a smile back, unable to resist the sunshine in her grin even in this state of his, though it's a bit more muted and reserved compared to his usual ones.]
... yeah. Let's do that, then.
[Even his voice, which he was trying to keep light and agreeable (despite the slight creak that came along with his tears), was a bit lower in energy then one would expect from such an offer. He was grateful for it, and maybe once he got back on his feet again, these worries would vanish, but...]